Wednesday, December 4, 2013

Pissed off at the world! Its a Pagan thing.

       Well its 9am and I'm wide awake!!  This may not sound like much too some people but it’s unusual for me to be up before 11am.  I am a night owl and I also love to sleep and to dream so for several months I've been in the pattern of staying up till 3am and sleeping very very late.  This morning I woke at 8am on the verge of a panic attack,

   My stepson got fired from his job lst week because they found out he was trying to get a job with a small local business.  Since in the state of Arkansas they can fire him for any reason there isn't much he can do about it.  I'm in a panic because he hasn't gotten a job with this other company yet, his car payments are weekly, and he was supposed to be starting collage at the first of the year.  If he loses his car we will be expected to drive him and his girlfriend (who lives with us because her parents kicked her out for dating a white boy) back and forth to classes.   On top of that I have my husband trying to argue with me about business issues he doesn't really understand (he wouldn't be arguing about it if he did) and my sales slowing down because it’s the Holidays and people spend more money of gifts than they do the stuff that I sell.

  Add to that the very nasty ice storm coming and I'm praying we don’t loose power during that storm.  That's the one real negative about living out in the mountains.  Since you’re not in town you’re not going to get power back as soon as other people and when the ice knocks it out there is no way in hell you’re getting off the mountain to a place that does have powder.  I have a greenhouse full of tender tropical plants to worry about and no generator.  I've been puzzling for days over bringing them into the house as a precaution.  I had them in the kitchen all last winter because we didn't have the greenhouse up.  I also worry if the powder will be off for days or for hours and what kinds of emails and orders will be piling up while I'm gone.  The power being off for hours is only a concern for the greenhouse but days will definitely be a concern for business.  Plus my low income is making preparing for the ice storm difficult since I don't have the money to stock up on things we might need while were stuck on the mountain and unable to leave to get supplies for 4 days.

  As much as my husband plays the different lotteries you would think we would have won something big by now.  If he didn't snore so damn bad I could be sleeping in a bed instead of on the couch too.

 With all of this piled on top of my head I have slipped into a very bad mood.  I'm pissed off at the world and the Universe as a whole.  With all of this piled on top of my head I have slipped into a very bad mood.  I'm pissed off at the world and the Universe as a whole because we haven't won some big prize to keep me from being concerned about finances right now (it’s a Pagan thing)


  1. How about waiting for the worst to happen before getting in a panic over it?

    All the same, I’m keeping my fingers crossed for you. (that’s a pagan thing too)

  2. I wish I could do that, but I'm a bit of a worry wort.